Matthew Denny

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Fri, 09 Dec 2011 00:00:00 -0600

Closing Ceremonies

Thu, 07 Apr 2011 14:17:00 -0500

After so many busy museums and galleries, we spent Tuesday with an American guide who showed us some of his favorite neighborhoods. We probably walked more today than any other day, but it was noticeably more mellow without the stress of navigating the touristy attractions.

After learning some Parisian history, we had falafel sandwiches — the guide kept bragging that Lenny Kravitz ate there… you know, in case you wanted to know where Lenny Kravitz got his falafel. It was delicious, but it made my sweet tooth ache, so we stopped off for some hot chocolate for dessert. This was the most unusual and most amazing hot chocolate I’ve ever had. It was pretty thick while still being drinkable, unlike the drinking chocolate I’ve had, which had more of a pudding consistency. And it wasn’t sweet. Just great chocolate flavor. It was pretty perfect, so the only bad thing I can say about it was that the weather was a little warm for hot chocolate.

I will try to be brief about the Louvre. It’s just… big. Too much to see, too many people. The first few minutes are exciting because it’s such a spectacle, but once I actually tried to enjoy the contents of the museum, I blew my fuse pretty fast. The only way to stay sane in such a huge building is to pick one hall of one wing of one section to specialize in. We briefly glanced at some of the big names (Mona Lisa, Venus de Milo, etc) then proceeded to an area of French paintings that was more secluded upstairs in the museum.

I have a question. Did French woman not wear clothes in real life, or are they just painted that way? Seriously, 90% of the paintings in the French rooms are naked women. I’m not complaining, I just need help distinguishing between art and history. Were the paintings intended to be sexual, or did the subject normally wear lingerie?

After seeing so much old art, I have begun debating what type of art to commission for myself. Would I look better as a marble bust, or as a giant oil painting? If I went with a bust, I think I should wait until I have better defined facial features and longer hair. If I choose a painting I would need to further decide whether my wife would join me (and if she would be wearing any clothes, for the sake of authenticity) or whether it would be a solo portrait.

To conclude our week in Paris, we took a cooking class. While we shopped for ingredients at the local market, I learned everything I know about cheese. We also enjoyed free samples, which has a different meaning in France than America. We think of a free sample as something that a geriatric microwaves and serves in a paper cup at Costco. In France, they served the most delicious gourmet fresh food as we passed the stalls.

As part of the introduction to the recipe, our instructor explained that this meal would be a good thing to cook at the end of a long say if you just want something simple. After all, people who work don’t always have time to prepare extravagant French cuisine on a daily basis. We split into four pairs to cook the same dish, eager to learn a French recipe that we could use to impress our friends.

Don’t get your hopes up, friends. After five hours of complete confusion, the four groups had quite different variations of the identical recipe. Nobody knew which was correct, so we threw them all together and called it a day. The asparagus with cheese sauce in puff pastry was tasty. The chicken in cream sauce was less tasty, but I’m not much a fan of drenching my meat in cream sauce. Neither was worth the five hour process, that’s for sure.

Not sure how to sum up the week in Paris. People warned me that French people aren’t very friendly, and I would say that was confirmed for the most part. The landmarks and history in the city are remarkable. The food didn’t meet my high expectations. I’m very happy that I experienced Paris in my lifetime, but I’m not in a hurry to return. I have my trademark Eiffel Tower photos, now all I need is to figure out a way to get more cheese, baguettes, and pastries in my life.

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Thu, 07 Apr 2011 00:00:00 -0500

Productive Tourist

Mon, 04 Apr 2011 11:10:00 -0500

I love cities that are easy to get around. We’ve figured out how to use the metro and the city has nice big sidewalks, so we are covering lots of ground.

I can’t say I learned anything new at the military museum, but I really enjoyed hearing the World War II story from a French perspective. I wasn’t surprised that the role of France in the war was emphasized (and maybe a little bit glorified), but the historians of an occupied city certainly give attention to different details than American textbooks. It was also fun to explore the halls of armor and weapons from different centuries and continents.

Napoleon’s tomb is pretty amazing. I still don’t know anything about it besides what it looks like. Maybe it’s part of the military museum? Maybe it’s in a cathedral? All I can say is this: if there were a real-life global treasure hunt in the style of National Treasure or The Da Vinci Code, this is probably one of the stops on the journey. If you are Indiana Jones, save yourself the trouble of hunting clues and just start here.

Next up is Palais Garnier — the Paris opera house, setting of The Phantom of the Opera. As fans of the musical, we were excited to see the chandelier and box five. But that excitement was completely overshadowed by the awe of walking up the grand staircase and into the grand foyer. The attention to detail is unbelievable; even the most hidden corners were accented with gold or carved marble. The ceilings are covered in beautiful paintings. The luxury is in excess to the point of being absurd.

We watched a chamber music concert in the opera house while we were there. It was nice to see the auditorium and the Chagall ceiling, but really most of our time was spent adjusting in our tiny seats, looking for an exit, and listening to the hostess explain something at great length in French. No breaks, no way to escape. I amused myself by giving the page turner (there was a girl sitting beside the pianist to turn the pages of the music) an imaginary back story and personality. Sweet girl.

I once had a brief layover in Paris that allowed me to see Notre Dame from a distance, so this longer trip allowed me to see the inside. Being completely packed with tourists took away a little bit from the experience, but it helped that they were playing some ambient chants to set the mood. My family is not very patient, so the presence of a line to get into any attraction is usually enough to convince us to change our plans. Ascending the towers of Notre Dame did not make the cut, much to nobody’s dismay.

Time to bandage up my blisters. Lots of distance yet to cover.

First Impressions

Sat, 02 Apr 2011 14:10:00 -0500

After a “weather delay” in Chicago and a redirection through London (home of my future wife) I finally met my family in Paris on a beautiful Friday afternoon. They were eager to wine and dine me the moment I arrived.

That night I had the best meal of the week: cheese, baguette, and pastries. I thought I knew a little bit about cheese, baguette, and pastries before coming to France. This meal turned that all upside-down. It was a glorious experience, and my only complaint is that it will be impossible to recreate once I leave.

It’s apparent that the French have a tremendous appreciation for fresh food. Rather than picking up highly preserved groceries from the supermarket every week or two, shoppers pick up fresh groceries daily from shops scattered throughout each neighborhood. Any storefront could be on the cover of a gourmet food magazine. As a bonus, some fruit shops carry the tropical fruits I enjoyed in the Caribbean that are too obscure to find in American grocery stores.

My least favorite aspect of Paris is that everything is so small. I feel like Gulliver here — the cups are no bigger than shot glasses. I will say that I appreciate laughing at all the little scooters buzzing around the streets, though. Even a leather jacket can’t make a scooter driver look cool.

Time to start chipping away at the jet lag. We can see the top of the Eiffel Tower from our apartment, so I’m sure the hourly strobe lights will help me sleep. The museum marathon begins tomorrow…

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Sat, 12 Feb 2011 00:00:00 -0600

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Sat, 25 Dec 2010 00:00:00 -0600

Too Much History

Wed, 02 Jun 2010 20:41:00 -0500

The Victoria and Albert Museum is incredible. It is enormous, and every room is impressive. You could spend a week there and not see the entire museum. The Winston Churchill Museum was okay, but the highlight of that visit happened after I exited and I found a perfect English gentleman sitting outside, bowler cap and all. I wanted to pick him up and hug him.

Next stop was an old operating theater, where we watched an hour lecture and amputation demonstration. I loved it, but some of the other tourists were less excited about the graphic descriptions. There is a small museum associated with the operating theater, and I saw something miraculous: frankincense and myrrh! They are real things! I never knew what they were, but I held some of each in my hand and felt very connected to Jesus. Kinda.

The funny thing about the old medical museum was that it was awfully similar to a torture museum I once saw in Italy. The devices were practically identical in appearance and function, but with different names. Curious…

Where's the Gravy?

Sun, 30 May 2010 15:15:00 -0500

My favorite British food is Indian food. It is so good, and it is everywhere. I had Indian three or four times this week and it was all delicious. Traditional British food, on the other hand, is merely… eatable. It seems to come in pairs: fish & chips or bangers & mash. It’s all pub food, and frankly I would prefer the nuts at some of the pubs to the food.

The pubs are great though. I love the beer and the atmosphere. The names are also fun. There are three kinds of names: Ye Olde something; Animal body parts, like The Goat Leg or The Sheep Head; or names of random dudes, like The Clarence.

At the end of the work day, the sidewalks outside the pubs are packed with people enjoying a beer on their way home. And you know what else? You pay the price of your drink, nothing more. If the beer is three pounds, you pay three pounds. I love it. No bartenders with attitudes, just good beer and good company.

We have also enjoyed some good French food, but French people must be tiny. My meal of scallops with salad was actually one scallop cut into quarters with a single piece of green garnish. Looking around the table, everyone had about one full bite of food on their plates. When it is as flavorful and tasty as these were, of course, you savour the tiny morsels, but I’m just saying. I could have finished my meal in a bite if I wanted.

The last thing to mention is the tea. I have always been a tea drinker, but it is never such a process as it is here. Having tea in London is so much more than boiling water and adding a tea bag. Having tea here would be incomplete without sitting down with sandwiches and cookies. I think I prefer to keep my tea casual, but I could see how afternoon tea with snacks and friends could be an enjoyable activity periodically.

The Day Love Died

Sun, 30 May 2010 07:50:00 -0500

Love Never Dies is the sequel to my favorite musical, the Andrew Lloyd Webber masterpiece Phantom of the Opera. To my dismay (but not my surprise) it was a complete disaster.

Let’s start with the music. The best songs in the entire show are the ones from the original. The new music is modified carnival music, which makes sense because the play takes place on Coney Island. I only remember one of the new songs, which was the title track. In the play, this song is supposed to represent the Phantom’s magnum opus… the song that will bring Christine back to him. Instead the whole number is a joke. It was supposed to be the climax of the show, and I laughed the entire time.

The lyrics were as worthless as the music. Throughout the play, most of the characters just narrated the story in prose, but it was set to music. On the rare occasion that the lyrics did rhyme, it was so forced it was painful. Just imagine someone reading from a bad romance novel to the melody of carnival music, and save yourself the trouble of listening to the soundtrack.

How about the plot? For the sake of simplicity, let’s call the original play a love story: the characters’ actions are motivated by love. As the play goes on, the characters develop and we enjoy learning more about them. In the sequel, the same characters are suddenly motivated by money; Meg is a prostitute and Raoul is a broke alcoholic. Everyone is static and uninteresting. You don’t leave the theater with any sense of satisfaction, or with the feeling that your time and money were well spent.

The character of the Phantom was another disappointment. In the original, he is mysterious and suave in his tight tuxedo with slicked black hair. When we are introduced to him in a puff of smoke behind a mirror, he seems almost supernatural… truly like an angel of music. If that’s not enough, he lurks in the bowels of an opera house. Cool! Contrast that with the sequel. We are introduced to a lovesick Phantom wearing a black bathrobe who runs a carnival from a giant purple head-shaped room with the help of three henchmen straight out of Rocky Horror Picture Show. He is an emo carnie bum who got caught up in some baby daddy drama.

And I use the word “drama” loosely. How’s this for foreshadowing: early in the play we learn that Christine’s son is 10 years old. Soon after, we learn that the Phantom and Christine slept together 10 years ago. I heard the lady behind me say, “I bet the Phantom is the father.” She deserved a bigger sarcastic applause than the entire show.

Thank goodness that was not the only production we saw in London. Our theater experience was redeemed by the musical Oliver and the opera La Fille du Regiment.

I had seen Oliver once before, but it was a small local production. The music is catchy, and the plot is simple. I like that. The opening song was pretty amazing; over the course of “Food, Glorious Food,” about 50 kids emerge from various doors in the stage.

I loved the sets because they actually complemented the play. There weren’t bells and whistles added for spectacle; the elevators and trap doors all served a purpose. Contrast that, once again, with Love Never Dies, which was full of gimmicky costumes and sets.

We also saw La Fille Du Regiment at the Royal Opera. Turns out I actually enjoy going to the opera. Who knew? Earlier in the day, we had taken a backstage tour of the Royal Opera House, which definitely increased my appreciation for the production. We had the chance to see how the huge sets are moved and stored, and we watched a ballet rehearsal.

I am told that I was privileged to see Juan Diego Flórez and Natalie Dessay as the principles in our performance, and yes, they were fantastic. I loved everything about the evening: the sets, the music, the singing, the acting, the costumes. I used to make fun of my mom for being an opera fanatic, but she has successfully converted me.

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Thu, 27 May 2010 00:00:00 -0500

Confluence Point

Mon, 11 Jan 2010 19:47:00 -0600

Spending my first full winter in St. Louis has been a good experience. I have learned that winter is like Chinese food. My favorite Chinese restaurants serve a highly Americanized version of Chinese food, while authentic Chinese food terrifies me. In the same way that a Chinese customer would scoff at what I call good Chinese food, a Midwesterner would laugh at a San Francisco winter. So I wasn’t cut out for a “real” winter, but when it pains you to laugh at me because each breath temporarily freezes your lungs, then try to convince me why eating chicken feet is better than a big plate of Mongolian beef.

In the spirit of adventure and trying new things despite the cold, Johnny and I traveled north to visit the convergence of the Missouri and Mississippi rivers. It was a very cool sight. From the banks of the Missouri, we could hear the slush of the partially frozen river flowing by. There were big circular ice rafts that rolled along the edge of the river past us. Between Missouri and Illinois, the Mississippi had a layer of ice several inches thick that buckled up against obstacles. It’s worth the short drive if you’ve never seen an icy river.

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Mon, 11 Jan 2010 11:09:00 -0600

America by Road

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 14:28:00 -0500

The drive from San Francisco to St. Louis was amazing. We met up with Ken before we left to discuss taking a scenic route, which was priceless. On the road, we covered 2,463 miles over four days and saw 44 state plates traveling across California, Nevada, Utah, Colorado, Kansas, and Missouri.

Our first diversion from the main route was to take Route 50 through Nevada. This road is known as “The Loneliest Road in America” because there are so few signs of civilization for miles. We loved it. The road wound through huge expanses of Nevada desert with nice mountains off in the distance. We drove 75 miles without seeing another car.

That night, we crossed the border into Utah. The road changed from gray to red, and the mountains on the horizon were purple in the sunset. We stopped at a diner for dinner and finished the 13 hour drive in Cedar City, Utah. It was a small town, but even a small town can feel like a thriving metropolis when you have spent the entire day in Nevada.

We spent day two in Southern Utah by Ken’s recommendation. It was the most beautiful drive I have ever seen. I felt like I was in a theme park, because every mile was different than the last. One moment, we were in a golden aspen forest, and the next, we were surrounded by open plains. The terrain transformed within minutes from a barren gray moonscape to a deep red canyon.

We took many opportunities to pull over and take pictures. Unfortunately, most of the pictures we took from the car are better views of bugs on the windshield than the scenery. There was one section where we were driving on a ridge, with steep slopes and amazing views on both sides of the car. Soon after that, we were following the Colorado River through a canyon.

Once we entered the plains of Kansas, it got pretty boring. The town on the border of Kansas and Colorado is called Kanorado, and that was probably the most exciting moment of the day. Also the billboard for Jesus Heals and Restores, Pornography Destroys immediately followed by Adult Superstore was entertaining.

We learned a valuable lesson on our journey across the country. You don’t have to travel to the other side of the world to see something amazing. We have awesome natural beauty right here if you go out and look for it. I can’t wait for the drive back!

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Tue, 13 Oct 2009 11:09:00 -0500

Los Angeles

Sat, 19 Sep 2009 15:08:00 -0500

With no job prospects and nothing to do, I decided to spend a few days in Los Angeles this week. Wednesday turned out to be a highlight of my life. I finally spent a day at Disneyland.

Within moments of entering California Adventure, a High School Musical parade began. Soon after, Victoria and I were hugging Minnie and Mickey. I was proudly wearing my first-timer pin, and an employee enthusiastically wished me a magical day. The adventure was getting off to a marvelous start.

There were barely any lines, so we made it onto most of the rides and attractions. My favorites were the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror, the Indiana Jones ride, and Pirates of the Caribbean. Honorable mention to the Buzz Lightyear ride, where you have to shoot at Zorg and they keep track of points. I think the scores speak for themselves.

I was laughing the entire day. It really was the most fun I have had in a long time. After about 10 hours at the park, we were glad to sit down for some dinner to relax.

On Thursday, Adam gave me a tour of Beverly Hills and Rodeo Drive. We visited lots of stores, Adam flirted with lots of girls, and we enjoyed a delicious lunch. Then I went to Victoria’s film class where we watched Jennifer’s Body and had a Q&A with the writer, director, and producer. The movie was awesome, and it was cool to talk with the creators, especially Diablo Cody who also wrote Juno.

That night, I went out for a night on Fraternity Row at USC. That was an experience. In St. Louis, anyone is welcome at any fraternity, but apparently only girls are welcome at the USC fraternities. I went to the USC chapter of my fraternity and barely made it in after a thorough security screening.

Friday I explored Hollywood Boulevard. We saw lots of tours and fake celebrities. The costumes were comically bad. Darth Vader was shorter than me and wore tights. Marilyn Monroe was really old, but proudly stood over a vent in the sidewalk to show off her legs. Three Spidermen bounced around various newspaper stands and trash cans, vying for position.

After lunch, we grabbed some coffee and as we were walking down the sidewalk, some police cars raced up and a police helicopter appeared overhead. A pair of officers ran out of the cars carrying shotguns. They stood up against a bank and peeked around the corner into the window. The strange thing was that, as this was happening, everyone went about their business completely normally. The police made no announcements, and barely drew any attention to themselves.

As people began to notice the shotgun-wielding police, they turned to watch. No one knew what to do. What does a bystander do during a bank robbery? A lady behind me asked if we should duck in case they started shooting. We all just watched curiously. Suddenly a woman on her cell phone exited the bank carrying a baby. Everyone gasped. But then that was it. Nothing really happened. She gave the police a confused look and kept walking completely nonchalantly.

The police looked at each other. They cautiously approached the door and entered. After about a minute, the helicopter left, and everyone resumed what they were doing. It was one of the most exciting times that nothing has happened. What really struck me was just how mildly everyone reacted. As if it was a completely normal activity.

So to recap: Go to Disneyland. Take a USC film class. Don’t bother with Fraternity Row. Always carry a shotgun.

Hoover Wilderness

Sun, 13 Sep 2009 18:49:00 -0500

My high school has a great outings department, and this weekend I got a call asking if I would be available to help lead a trip to the Hoover Wilderness near Yosemite. Without hesitation, I postponed my road trip to Los Angeles and started packing. There were six students, one teacher, and a dog on the trip, and it was a great group.

Once we distributed the group gear and ate lunch, we started the hike. The ascent was not long, but we enjoyed the views of the surrounding mountains and the sound of the creek running alongside the trail. We arrived at Green Lake within a couple hours and set up camp, where we would stay for the next two nights.

With mountains all around us, we didn’t quite experience a sunrise. Instead, our morning began with the sunlight slowly engulfing the rocky peaks around the lake, which was so calm in the morning it was like a mirror. Ken explored the shore for a good spot to go fishing with Ouzel. I choked down some oatmeal so that I would survive the day hike.

We walked up to a higher lake on Day 2 to spend the afternoon. Just as we were settling in, we began to hear thunder. Dark clouds slowly started to creep over the ridge. Little pellets of ice began to fall on the trees. A cold rain interrupted our lunch. We stuck it out under trees until the rain had passed, and started back towards camp.

Surrounded by granite mountains, the thunder echoed endlessly. It was amazing, the whole group would admire a lightning bolt across the sky, and then the thunder would hit and bounce around for minutes. It was like the whole wilderness was hungry and we were hiking through its growling stomach.

After escaping the cold rain, we were all tired, so we took naps in our tents. When we woke up, Ken and I went fishing with Ouzel while the students investigated an “island” in the lake. After dinner and a few mugs of hot chocolate, we watched the stars through the trees and headed to bed.

We were all so tired after our adventurous weekend, even Ouzel was sleeping in the van on the ride home. Nothing beats a bath when your legs are covered in dirt, so that’s where I am headed after I unpack.

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Sat, 12 Sep 2009 00:00:00 -0500

Departure

Tue, 25 Aug 2009 12:03:00 -0500

The last week was a lot of hard work, but I actually really enjoyed it. We packed up the tables early, so we are our meals sitting in a circle on the ground. The last night together was one of my favorite of the summer. We had big plans to go out drinking and dancing, but it was a Sunday night, and the bars were dead. After dinner we walked down the street looking for something to do, and the most wonderful thing happened.

Imagine walking down a seemingly normal street in your town. For example, Miller Avenue in Mill Valley, or Delmar Boulevard in St. Louis. There are restaurants and shops lining the road. You are enjoying your warm evening stroll. Then you see flashing lights up in the distance. What could it be?

A bumper car arena, of course! It was so funny because we had all driven up and down this road many times before in the middle of the day, and none of us had ever seen the place. It was like a dream. We got to the window to buy tokens, and when Motts asked for a receipt, the guy laughed. I suppose the idea of bumper cars as a business expense is pretty silly.

The battle was epic. In America, bumper cars have to be so safe because people would sue if they scratched their knee. Not so in St. Martin. These things were fast, and no seatbelts. I was almost thrown out of my car during some of the big collisions. Put that on your list. Bumper cars after a couple pina coladas and bottles of wine is pretty amazing.

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Tue, 25 Aug 2009 11:09:00 -0500